Just Listen

Guard my words and guard my steps, Lord; I tend to ramble when afraid. Guide Your words to broken ears; I tend to expect them to be painful when I'm trembling. My stubborn mind can be made up so hastily; especially in desperate times. The healing of Your love it so desires- "Lord please don't let me fall before I'm lifted." When I enter Your House, may it be in anticipation of listening- of listening- without giving- without trying- without relating- without judging. When thoughts are abundant- Lord, please hold my tongue. When words creep to the surface with a pounding heart, I must not have paid attention.
Amen.

Lord, please don't let me fall before I'm lifted

These are my random thoughts....if they sound dark at times, it's because I am being honest...if they are lame at times...it's because I am being honest.

"Lord, please don't let me fall before I'm lifted." I used to pray with remorse and white knuckles; my heart pounding to the rhythm of my pleas. One night You stood me up and I thought I'd never fall again.....but..."Lord, please don't let me fall before I'm lifted!" My eyes are closed so tight; fingers in my ears, but oh how free my mouth is! Bind it shut! Bind my mouth and open my eyes! Pull the fingers from my ears, but quiet my own voice so I can hear! I cannot live in the gray as before. I am not even welcome there anymore, but I feel shunned by the white. I pretend black isn't even a word, although it has taken up residence in the place between my fingertips and my eyelids. I cry out to You from morning until night- "Lord, please don't let me fall before I'm lifted!"
Amen.